NOPE

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sledogirl97:

willgrahamcrackercrumbs:

the “no sleveless tops” american public school dress code policy is impeding on our 2nd amendment right to bare arms

This may be the most fantastic thing i have ever read

5 hours ago
214,193 notes
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cokeflow:

asshairs:

PEOPLE STILL LISTEN TO OWL CITY HAAAAAAAHA

someone obviously doesn’t get 1,000 hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs lmao

5 hours ago
181,194 notes
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railroadsoftware:

something interesting that i have noticed: for a native english speaker, such as myself, who has spoken english throughout their entire life and has been completely surrounded by it, it is actually quite an easy language to master  

5 hours ago
1,154 notes
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justofficialunitedstatesthings:

savannahdewbs:

justofficialunitedstatesthings:

fun fact: officialunitedstates currently holds the world record

For?

the world record

5 hours ago
2,844 notes
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bombing:

i want two million dollars in marked bills. i want each one of them to be marked with a small happy face to represent me when i receive the cash. then you can have your son back

5 hours ago
1,162 notes
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"She was laughing even as we kissed and kissed again.There is no better taste than this: someone else’s laughter in your mouth."

- Forever by Maggie Stiefvater (via parachute3s)

5 hours ago
68,210 notes
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lolitaintheskywithdiamonds:

lamp from the interior’s section of Victoria Maiden

5 hours ago
4,539 notes
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helioscentrifuge:

its a metaphor. i put my smooches on the cuties but i don’t light them on fire.

6 hours ago
35 notes
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6 hours ago
9,128 notes
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loppett:

i don’t trust people who are super into “proper grammar” and “correct punctuation” because what lies just beyond that smug superiority is some sinister classism that gets acutely racist in a red hot minute, so for similar reasons I’m instantly wary of anyone who takes great pride in their love of “logic” and “intellect” 

6 hours ago
12,426 notes
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crustified-again:

corgisandboobs:

thesuperjew:

The turtle cavalry is serious shit

"Onward, alligator steed!"
"I’m a crocodile."
"Silence, water horse!"

The one in the back looks like it’s wearing a turtle for a hat

6 hours ago
178,096 notes
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eeveez:

does anyone else sort of get a lesbian vibe from ellen degeneres?

7 hours ago
40,234 notes
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7 hours ago
144,102 notes
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phanphanphan:

part of me wants to do really well in school and get an amazing job and the other part of me just wants to lie on the floor and do nothing ever because i’m gonna die in the end anyway

7 hours ago
28,856 notes
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girl: babe come over
boy: I can't I'm having a threesome with an older couple
girl: my parents aren't home
boy: I know
7 hours ago
24,363 notes